The Art of Honest Feedback

Painting or creating for someone else is thrilling... and terrifying.

You want them to love it. You want it to feel like them. But you also need to know if they secretly hate it.

And if you are painting for a friend?
Well, buckle up.

Because friends are kind.
Sometimes too kind.

They’ll say, “Oh, I love it!” with the same tone people use when they see a baby... who looks, uh unique.

That’s the tricky part about painting for people you know personally.
Their feedback comes wrapped in love, which means it’s rarely 100% honest.
And while that’s sweet, it’s not always helpful.

But getting honest reactions isn’t about brutal critique, it’s about clarity. It’s about seeing through someone else’s eyes what your work really communicates.

My sneaky test

When my friends commissioned me for a big painting, 140x100 cm, I decided to make a smaller test piece first, 60x90 cm, just to explore the colors and flow.

And since I share my new paintings with them every week (and they are brutally honest then, when it's not meant for them), I sent the test piece with no caption and no explanation, just like it's my new painting for the week.

Ten minutes later, my phone went off:

“Oh, I LOVE this one! Makes me feel like it's spring”

That’s when I told them it was actually their test piece, and if this was the direction they wanted to go in.

And what happened then, made me so sure they truly loved it. They loved it so much they changed their whole plan and commissioned a diptych (2 smaller panels) instead of one large painting. Because they were completely set on having that test piece as one of the paintings, and that’s when I finally breathed again.

That was pure, unfiltered feedback.
No politeness. Just an instinctive, honest response.

Why honest feedback matters

Before painting full-time, I worked as a graphic designer for years.
I’ve probably made over 500 logos/branding identities in my life... from the elegant to the slightly questionable.

And I learned one thing very early on: unfiltered feedback is gold.

Sometimes in the first design set, there’s a hit.
Sometimes it’s a total miss.
But that first gut reaction from the client tells you everything.
You learn how they think, what they value, and what they really want, not just what they say they want. Sometimes hearing what someone dislikes tells you more than all the compliments in the world.

Painting is the same.

When you’re working on a commission, you need to understand not only your own creative direction but also the emotional language of your client.
What makes them feel calm, excited, or nostalgic.

If they’re filtering their feedback to protect your feelings, you lose that insight and that’s where things can drift off course.

How to get honest reactions

Honesty doesn’t happen by accident. You have to design for it.

Here’s what’s worked for me:

1. Take the pressure off.
   Don’t present the work like it’s the grand reveal.
   Just say, “Here’s something I’ve been exploring,” and watch their first, natural reaction.

2. Send it without context.
   Like my little test trick. No caption, no “this might be yours.” Just art. Let their instincts lead.

3. Ask for feelings
   Instead of “Do you like it?” ask, “How does this feel to you?” or “Does this fit the mood you had in mind?”
   People are better at describing emotions than opinions.

4. Normalize honesty.
   Let them know you want unfiltered feedback.
   Say it upfront: “Please be brutally honest, I promise my I can handle it.”

5. Watch the energy.
   Sometimes it’s not what they say but how they react. The speed, the tone, the excitement, those are your best cues.

The beauty of honest reactions

Unfiltered feedback isn’t about criticism. It’s about alignment.

It’s how you bridge the gap between what you made and what they feel.
It’s how you build trust. That makes people come back not just for another painting, but for the experience of being seen and understood.

And when it works, it’s magic.
It becomes a shared moment. A spark of “yes, that’s it.”

So if you’re painting, designing, or creating anything that ends up in someone else’s hands, don’t run from honesty.
Invite it in, even if it feels uncomfortable at first.

Because honest reactions aren’t just feedback, they’re connection.

And that’s what art, and good design, have in common.

If you’d like to commission a painting of your own, you can send in your request here.

Have a great week,
Rinske